Dream Job....Getting Paid To Watch Football

What would you consider a dream job? If you could sit around and get paid to do one thing, what would it be? Are they out there?

Of course they are.

I would consider a dream job to be something like being a beer tester or even a brewmaster. And a porn star would be fun. As long as it was in a clean environment and the chicks were average or above (who am I kidding?). Anthony Bourdain has a wonderful job traveling the globe eating delicious foods from every sort of country. As well as most events journalists that get backstage passes front row seats to everything that is sweetness.

Well Anthony White has his idea of a dream job. He's the assistant designer at EA's Tiburon studio in Maitland, Florida where they pay him to sit in on football games on a daily basis. But what exactly does he do? YahooGames.com's Mike Smith has him quoted,

"I am responsible for the design of the X's and O's," White told the Sentinel. "How teams play in the game. How players react to certain situations that come up. The coaching tendencies."

Yeah, that sounds pretty freakin' cool. But I wonder if he stumbles upon little secrets of info that pro team's would love to get their grubby mitts on? Maybe not, but his job is at the top of the heap for dream jobs listed at ListAfterList.com and here's the rest.

Video Game Designer -- Salary: Starts at $25,000 with high growth potential.
Brewmaster -- Salary: $30,000-$60,000 per year
Toy Creator – Salary: Average is $57,000 per year.
Comic Book Guru -- Starts around $20,000 per year.
Casino Host -- Salary: $15 per hour and up.

So get out there and get a dream job. Even if you're no good at it. Remember what Kurt Vonnegut said, "If you can do a half-assed job of anything, you're a one-eyed man in a kingdom of the blind."

Tailgating with The Freedom Grill

Football season is just a couple of weeks underway. So I hope we are all prepared for what else other than the art of tailgating. But I would like to introduce a must have commodity that will have your friends and family following you closer than ever.

It's called The Freedom Grill, and it's taking the tailgating scene by storm. Or fire.

Imagine not having to lug around a large grill or even a miniature version of a grill that's a bit smaller than a bag of coals. Or just think what it would be like to be able to grill out wherever you went. Well these attach/detachable grills conveniently range in size from the FG-50 to three sizes up at the FG-900. And tailgating just doesn't get any easier.

With this puppy strapped to your bumper, Bear Grylls won't be the only guy around that can start a fire in the rain. But don't take my word for it, take FreedomGrill.com's,

"The FG-100 isn’t just for tailgating either. The optional backyard stand allows this to be your only grill. Just slide the grill head off of the arm assembly and onto the stand and you can cook away from the vehicle."

This modern day parking lot caterer has been admired by major news agencies and those alike. Such as ESPN2, The Best Damn Sports Show Period, Trick My Truck, The Discovery Channel, USA Today, and Stuff Magazine.

So check out there site and browse around. They have a nifty demo video, featured recipes, their own brand of Freedom Grill Firebrand Grilling Sauces, and even pictures of really hot chicks if you look hard enough.

Flavorites....Inglehoffer Mustards

If you don't like mustard then you are not a true mayon. Yeah i'll say it. With pride. Real men love the yellow stuff. And one brand has " My Flavorite" written all over it.

Inglehoffer mustards. Mmmmmm freakin' mmm mmm.

If you haven't enjoyed this brand of gourmet mustards or horseradish sauces you are missing out on a life changing experience. A tongue tackling extravaganza of spice and everything nice. And just in time for football season.

Who out there will tell me that they don't salivate to the smell of bratwurst on the grill? And that they don't break the mop out at the thought of adding a nice spicy brown or dijon to it. Who doesn't make a super fat sandwich without considering the satisfaction that is a course Stone Ground Mustard? Or even let mustard play a crucial roll in the everlasting friendship you have with pretzels.

Inglehoffer is actually a product by the successful Beaverton Foods in Beaverton, Oregon. It was all started by a women, one of the few good ones, by the name of Rose Biggi in 1929 who started door to door and then went industrial sized. They have been working their behinds off ever since to give people around the world incredible condiments. How about some info from LindiBiggi.com

"What started as Rose’s basement experiment has now grown to a family-owned, multimillion dollar corporation with over 150 specialty condiments sold internationally. The company’s products have won numerous World Championship and Mustard Mania awards and have earned prestigious praise from top culinary experts worldwide. Our company was also named Oregon’s Processor of the Year."

Okay, so I make a mean tavern. And mostly thanks to the good folks at Beaverton Foods. I wouldn't substitute any other mustard for their Sweet Honey Mustard that gives that tavern a delicious sweetness. And I sure as hell wouldn't trade their Extra Hot Horseradish Mustard for anything in the world. It gives a tavern an unprecedented zing. The Extra Hot Horseradish is also the Grand Champion in the World Mustard Championships.

So get some quick before it's all gone. Just joshin'. But head over to their website and snoop around. Check out their flavors that range from Wasabi to Cranberry.

Oh yeah, and put a little extra mustard on it!

For The Bachelor.... Burp For Fame....And Money

With all the talk of the great athletes that were breaking world records left and freakin' right at the 2008 Beijing Olympics, I thought it might be appropriate to bust out a different sort of World Record. One that might give hope to the bachelor.

Meet Paul Hunn of London, England. He is the man that discovered a hidden talent that might otherwise be labeled impolite or obnoxious. Or in the case of some countries around the world as applause toward the chef. Quite the opposite.

Burp!

It is definitely one of those things that all men have in common. Embracing the inevitable build up of gases as they travel harmoniously upward only to explode with harnessed musical energy. Beautiful. Even as children we sat around the lunch table with awe and appreciation for little Billy's talents as he belched the alphabet aloud. Beautiful.

Some might say as beautiful as world record setting races or games. Standing among the fastest and the strongest is..... the loudest.

Paul set this outrageous Guiness World Record for belching in 2000. His current best stands at an earpiercing 118.1 dB. !. I guess that's louder than a chain saw or even as loud as a jet engine on takeoff. And one hell of a way to tell the cook how good his food was.

Let's put that into perspective. If you were at a rock concert with Mr. Hunn and were indulging in carbonated alcoholic beverages at the time. And let's say he happened to burp midway through the second verse of the already deafening song. There is a good chance you would hear it a couple of feet away. That is crazy. Try it yourself and tell me if you can even feel anything.

So burp away bachelors. You might one day find yourself atop the list of competitive burpers. Or even giving Paul a run for his money. Try getting a head start by watching this Paul Hunn School of Burps training vid. Haha. And if you can't be the loudest maybe you can be the best. Submit a video to BurpForFame.com and you can win the title as well as $500. Easy money.

Chick Pic....Regina Deutinger

Birthdate: September 17, 1982
Birth Location: Munich, Germany
Measurements: 37-25-37
Height: 5ft 9in
Weight: 127 lbs
Eyes: Green
Hair: Blonde

Alright so I figure I can span the earth looking for the nicest ladies to admire. And thank God for the internet.

So we go to Germany. Regina has actually worked the Oktoberfest for the last three years. She was the April, 2008 Playmate and deservedly so. You can find jaw-dropping pictures that involve beer being poured all over the place. Yes! This chick is freakin' awesome.

As far as the body goes. It is clearly one of the nicest on the planet. But don't take my word for it. I suggest finding out for yourself. As for her face. I can't help but salivate watching her magnificent mouth speak German. While holding my beer for me. Check out this video and see for yourself.

The Olympic Games Need Foosball!

Seriously folks. With athletes that exhibit unbelievable physical ability there is always explosive reactions and powerful movements. With athletes that exhibit unbreakable focus and determination there are crazy reflexes and never-ending drive.

The likes of Michael Phelps and his awe inspiring swimming abilities make him a god amongst men. The blur that is Usain Bolt and his tremendous speed along with an ironic last name make him the modern day Achilles.

But what about Joe? Average or Shmoe. It doesn't matter. What about an athlete that is easier to relate to? A guy that just decided to become dedicated to something other than keeping his balance while at the pub. A guy that has natural ability coupled with mongoose-like reflexes, but couldn't jump a hurdle to save his life.

There must be something added to the Olympics that gives us hope. Badminton and ping pong are close, but not close enough. I am talking about foosball.

Foosball is the perfect international sport that relates to the same demographic. It deserves a spot in the almighty Olympics as a palette cleanser if you will. A change in pace to see an American Best Buy clerk take on a comic book store owner in Thailand. These are competitive men just the same and someone needs to help them prove their worth in the Olympic games of the future. Right? Well actually there just might be. Heres a tidbit from Wikipedia telling how,

"In 2002, the International Table Soccer Federation (ITSF) was established in France with the mission of promoting the sport of Table Soccer as an organizing sports body, regulating international competitions, and establishing the game with the International Olympic Committee (IOC) as an officially recognized Olympic sport."

I hope there is hope for foosball. There is already a World Championships, but I would love to see it in the big show. So come on foos fans, show your support and check out everything foos at the official website of the ITSF at Table-Soccer.org.

Man Tech....Horseshoes Scoreboard

Sometimes the simplest of technologies are what make men feel the most sophisticated. And we all know that simple means easy. Which is also a favorite of words shared by men everywhere.

So on that note....does anyone else have a brother or certain relative that can make the easiest or simplest thing harder than it has to be?

My brother can't play nice. He insists on insisting. He believes strongly that he is more aware of the activity in which he is involved than anyone around him. And is usually just the opposite. What would normally be resolved with easy communication is suddenly an argue-fest. And he is usually wrong. There must be a way to end these needless spats. A helpful devise?

Scoreboards.

A visual explanation of how the game is going. No more bickering over the actual score or having to explain precisely how you are up five more points. Scenario, a lovely game of horseshoes.

Check this baby out from a company called ScoreTower. It's a combo scoreboard slash beer holder! Check out how to buy it at Buyzillion.com. And now for a minor description,

* Provides players and spectators with game score
* Drink holder holds cans, bottles, coozies, and mugs
* Includes 5 Color-coded ScoreClamps to match your team's colors
* Stands a convenient 54" tall when in use
* Rugged Stake easily pushes into ground using just your foot

And there we have it. No more explainations or confrontations. Just good fun and scorekeeping. So make the ancient game of horseshoes or whatever game you must and argue about who's drinking your booze and not the score.

Check out some sweet horseshoe sets here. And if you're the type that plays late into the night, check out these glow in the dark shoes and stakes.Well, of course then you won't be able to see the scoreboard.

Mankind 101....Beards or Mustaches

There are definite characteristics that make men considerably more admirable. More alpha. More Manly.

Take John Holmes for instance. Name one man that wouldn't want a trait like that. And we know old Long John felt a bit more manly because of it. Well, besides his later career that kinda took a turn for the darker and less hetero side of his industry.

Enough trash talking I suppose. But what other characteristics make men more savvy and sophisticated than the next guy?

Broad shoulders, big nose, callused extremities? Or how about hairy backs and chests, missing fingers, beards or mustaches. Yes!

Beards.

Some men have goofy cuts of crap while others have perfectly sculpted face warmers. A beard can be a man's identity. It represents strength and wisdom. In some cases it defines a man. Like Grizzly Adams, ZZ Top, Ernest Hemmingway, Karl Marx and even Poseidon. Most of which are commemorated at the NationalBeardRegistry.org. Yep, there's a registry for beards.

Mustaches

Sports stars are also well known for their hairy faces. Even their beautiful examples of hairy upper lips. In fact there is a review of the 11 Greatest Mustaches in NFL History. You could imagine the terror of facing such a display of manitude on the face of Walter Payton. He's number 9. And what about M.J.'s nice little stache. Also, special thanks to Hitler and Salvador Dali for showing what isn't considered acceptable.

So whether or not you carry a proud goatee, mutton chops, or van dyke you can walk tall knowing that the guy that shaves is just one step behind in the growing race of magnificence.

Plus that guy might think you're a biker or even the Jesus reincarnate. Then they give you their money and possibly his wife. Bulletproof.

For Every Man....The Perfect Couch

Herodotus once said, "If a man insisted always on being serious, and never allowed himself a bit of fun and relaxation, he would go mad or become unstable without knowing it."

Well I don't exactly know who Herodotus is or was, but that mofo is right. We need to relax. We need more time being comfortable and worry free. If most guys out there are like me, then they rush to get everything done and then try to find time to unwind. And we all have our favorite places to take it easy around the house. None of which is a floor. Nope. It's something soft and pliable that molds to our aching bodies. Like.....a couch.

Man's favorite resting place. One of a few places that our bodies and minds are forced to adapt to. But in the end, we become one with our gravity reducing and perfectly assembled sack of wood and fiber. So is there a groovy alternative to our stereotypical sofa. I think there might be.

I believe it is called the Micama. And I also believe it is made in Sweden by a woman named Francesca Donati. I'm thinkin' she works for a company called Adero. Of course, I am only fluent in one language and it isn't anything close to northern european languages. So please forgive me for being ignorant. But anyway. The Micama is a completely different take on relaxation.

After getting over our manly inhibitions. We might be able to accept this somewhat fruity piece of furniture as a loin lounging alternative. I would. This thing looks like it could make Fat Albert as light as air. It bends, folds, wraps and twists to form any sort of getaway fantasy your heart desires. If I could read the gibberish on the website, I would tell you what it was made of. But it looks like it is made of pure comfort.

A negative might be that daddy's little getaway will be turned into every combination of fort after stylish fort by the kids. I would've straight abused that sh*t as a kid. I was a fort building masta. Yet a plus side might actually counter balance the negative. Maybe the fact that the entire Kama Sutra just got a whole lot more interesting.

Check our some pics at there website here, and drop me a line if you can translate.

Sweet Ride....Custom Golf Carts

Golf is seriously one of my most treasured past times. Nothing fulfills my inner necessities like topping or slicing an easy par four tee-off. Or missing a 3 foot birdie put that would have made up for that bogey on the last hole that should never have happened.

And then you come to the realization that your last $3 beer is about gone. Partly because you drink more when frustrated, and partly because the 1973 Silverstream golf cart slash rust bucket rattles your can over seemingly smooth terrain. Is it just me or is that bullsh*t. Not to mention my not-so-new clubs smacking against each other making each other even more not-so-new. Or the countless balls and tees or whatever valuables have bounced out over the years.

I freakin love golf!

Enough ranting already. There are options. Walking not being one of them. Since the old lady doesn't want to hold my beer for me anymore. Apparently the cooler is two heavy to lug around for 18 holes. I try telling her that it only gets lighter as the game goes on. But she doesn't listen.

Custom golf carts.

To the tune of.....a little out of my budget. But I shall dream. Because it makes me feel better. I feel rich in my dreams. I have everything there. It's nice. But seriously these third scale rough riders come in all sorts of pretty sweet models. Try Cadillac Escalades, H2 Hummers, Jeeps, Bentleys and even Roadsters. Most are tricked to the max like the Berline LS sold by Berline.

"Two-tone upholstery, chrome steering wheel, micro-sized rear-view mirrors, modified dash and rear seats, modified interior floor panel, chrome exterior paint, modified golf bag, and, of course, Falken low profile tires and alloy wheels."

Nothing about beer spill proof shocks!? She's got a Club Car IQ 48 Volt motor that pushes her to an eye watering 19.5 mph and 9.0 mph in reverse. Not to shabby. And did I mention it starts at a low low price of $13,495. Haha, thats like $700 per mph. Yeah and thats cheaper than a lot of other customs out there.

So I guess I will have to settle for the clubhouse special, but I'll live with it. And If I see one of these customs pull up bumping a stereo while I'm trying to make up for hole eight. There will be a six iron through their custom windshield. Insurance. With hail damage coverage?

Check out some others at BadAssGolfCarts.com

Not So Manly....Sergio Casian Aguilar

So here is a guy that just never quite figured life out. I don't think he realized the plus side of breathing and playing nice with others. I am guessing he was an outcast of sorts when he was in school and other peer ridden environments.

This is Sergio Casian Aguilar, 27, and probably this biggest piece of crap to walk the earth since Donald "Pee Wee" Gaskins.

The warm, loving and caring deprived Sergio decided that his two-year old boy wasn't deserving enough to grow and be a life-loving man. So he drove out on a dark rural road in between Fresno and Sacramento. Promising ice cream and cotton candy I'm sure. Then proceeded to pull the boy out of the truck and beat him like a grown man.

An elderly couple passed by and stopped to see what was going on with the truck that was pulled over to the wrong side of the road. They noticed the man was slapping, punching, kicking and slamming the hopeless toddler. They then tried to stop the man but were pushed to the side where they realized their helplessness and began dialing 911. Several other passer-bys pulled over to try and help but were also unsuccessful at stopping the obviously deranged man.

When the first officer arrived on scene, he warned the man to stop his actions and shot him between the eyes when he gave him the middle finger. Emergency correspondents then rushed the unrecognizable boy to the hospital where he died from his injuries. At this time they still haven't identified the boy, but he is believed to be the son of Sergio Casian Aguilar.

Well I have two boys, one of which is two years old. Yeah sure I want to beat him from time to time, but I don't. He finds himself in the most-likely-still-warm time out chair, And I certainly have imagined this boy as my own. I mean come the funk on man. My boy needs a little bit of help getting onto the couch let alone lessons on life. In this area I don't see how Sergio just gave up. It was said that Sergio had a calm demeanor and glazed look about him as he told witnesses that the boy was a "demon." And so one might suspect drugs. I do. But the man has no criminal history! How?

It just breaks my heart to imagine the scene. And I am sure the boy is now in the protecting arms of God. Yeah, and if you aren't a religious person, this kind of event makes you hope for a heaven. And a hell for the bastard who shorted the boy a life.

Read the story here.

Man vs. Time....Lazy is Healthy!

It seems that there just isn't enough time in life don't it? We are all in such a hurry to do everything as soon as we can. It seems we can't keep the house clean enough or the lawn short enough. When we want to sit and watch our shows, we must first do the dishes or run an errand to plug those bare spots in our cabinets and drawers.

When my computer is moving slower than a blue hair on the interstate I become extremely impatient. I then mumble things that will most likely move me to the front of the line in hell. And I honestly can't drive the speed limit because I always feel that I am running late to something mildly important. Or simply because I am anxious to get somewhere like the weekend card game. But never do I relax while I am behind the wheel. It is like my little four-wheeled time machine in which I control the speed and quickness of my duties.

According to Edgar S. Cahn, our failure to take life less seriously is killing us.

This 73-year old leads a different sort of campaign called "Slow Movement." The campaign is dedicated to keeping people informed about their busy lifestyles and how it affects them. He encourages laziness and a change certain areas of life that might speed us up with his brain child TimeBanks. Here, read this from CNN.com,

"They say we live in a culture in which being overworked has become a status symbol. Cahn created TimeBanks USA, a nonprofit group that treats time as money, to put the brakes on people's high-velocity lifestyles."

"TimeBanks members barter blocks of time known as "time dollars." One member may, for example, buy groceries for a stranger in exchange for someone else walking their dog."

Edgar says that every second of our life is precious because we can't get it back. We must occasionally turn off the phone or cook an "unhurried" meal for friends or go for walks. Or better yet, just sit in front of the television for a few hours a day like I do. Let the kids walk around with a full diaper from time to time.

" Companies will actually profit more if they don't overwork employees because they will become healthier and more productive, he says. He points to the robust economies of Western European countries, which treat their workers to more vacation time and shorter work weeks than their counterparts in the United States."

"If you live in Europe after the age of 50, you're only half as likely to develop chronic illnesses like heart disease and high blood pressure as those in the U.S.," he says. "People exercise more, they eat less food and they sleep more."

So here is proof for the old lady that when we just don't feel like taking out the trash this very minute, it will give us even more days in the end to take it out. Wait.......is that good or bad?

Talk amongst yourselves.

UFC 84....Ill Will

Alright. Once again a fantastic night of fights is abouts to begin. So I thought I would share my meaningless predictions for tonight's UFC 84 "Ill Will" at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas, Nevada.

Let's start at the bottom and work our way up this time.

Rich Clementi vs. Terry Etim
Okay, although Etim and his lanky ass has only only been beaten once out of eleven pro fights. I can't find it in my heart to give him a win against a pretty tough and well rounded Clementi. Rich has over four times as many fights against much tougher opponents and is coming off a good couple of wins against Sam Stout and Melvin Guillard. He also has only been submitted five times in his career and I personally don't see Etim catching him, even though nine out of his ten wins are by submission. Rich by a relatively dominant Uni.

John "War machine" Koppenhaver vs. Yoshiyuki Yoshida
To be honest, I am lacking in any form of knowledge of Yoshida. Although what I do know tells me he is a tough s.o.b. But so is the war machine. As he displayed in a crazy emotional win against Jared Rollins. Yoshida just seems to be more versatile in his wins and experience. I must give him the win here. Although this has the makings for a bang-out fight, Yoshida in the second, TKO.

Thiago Silva vs. Antonio Mendes
With the overwhelming atmosphere of the huge UFC crowd and the closing of the octagon, it takes a large toll on new fighters. And I don't see Mendes coming in that comfortable against an always aggressive Thiago Silva. Thiago by an easily achieved TKO/KO in the first.

Christian Wellisch vs. Shane Carwin
This is Shane's first fight in the UFC also, but I am not expecting as many jitters from this undefeated 6'4 muscle packed machine. Although he came in a bit light for the weigh-ins, he still outweighs Wellisch by almost thirty pounds. Their experience is similar, but Wellish is on his fourth fight in the UFC with two wins and one loss. But his losses were against stronger opponents and Shane could have Christian packing his bags. Carwin by first round sub.

Rameau Sokoudjou vs Kazuhiro Nakamura
These two former pride stars are going at it in the octagon tonight. That is pretty crazy in itself. Together, these two have fought a plethora of named fighters. Soko knocking most of them out while KazNak loses most to a close decision. But both are tougher than nails and both are coming off losses to "Lyota" Machida in their last UFC fights. Although KazNak has the experience here, I can't help but think that Soko will be the aggressor and try standing with his fellow jukoka. But in the end I see another cautious fight resulting in a Uni for Soko.

Dong-Hyun Kim vs Jason Tan
Alright, simply put, Kim has the hands while Tan has the ears. Haha. Just foolin' but seriously Mr. Dong can throw down although at times a bit cautious. He also has great td defense. Tan is also a well rounded fighter and is pretty aggressive to boot, but I think that Kim's cautiousness will prevail and he will eat out a Uni.

Ivan Salaverry vs. Rousimar Palhares
Ivan Salaverry is still fighting. This will most likely be his one fight for the year, but hey. The guy has been fighting for a pretty long time and has a descent game. He just seems to get KOed from time to time. Palhares, who is knew to me and the UFC, is an up and coming middleweight with a black-belt and only one loss to his name. He is strong and has good subs is what I hear. I must pick him. By submission at the end of round two. Yeah that sounds good.

Wilson Gouveia vs. Goran Reljic
Another new comer with a black belt on the card. Crimony. Croatian Goran Reljic is the Euro-Gracie Champ at 205 and is a pretty tough mofo from what I understand. But I do believe that the experience will play a role in the bout. That is where the not-so-bad himself Mr. Gouveia will pick up the slack. A guy who has twice as many fights and has yet to be submitted. He is on his sixth fight in the UFC, where I believe he is becoming more and more comfortable. I believe he has the tools to rock the undefeated Goran where he could finish the fight by TKO/KO in the second.

Keith Jardine vs. Wanderlei Silva
OOOOOOOhhhhhh baby. This one makes me all warm inside. This is one of those unpredictable, end of a round robin, type of fights. Keith picks apart Liddell, while Liddell beats up Wandy and now we see this. I must go with what I know. And that is that Jardine is a methodical hard hitting well rounded pissed off individual. While Silva is a psychopathic hard hitting well rounded annihilator. I just have a problem with Silva though. He doesn't seem to live up to his hype in the octagon. I must see something different from his tonight. And so leaves me with a clear Uni for The Dean of Mean. Good luck to both.

Tito Ortiz vs Ryoto Machida
I think this fight is the easiest to call. At least the winner will be. Who knows how it will end. Tito has fought everybody and beaten a lot of good fighters. But as of late I believe it is pretty well known that Tito is now a fighter for the money. While Lyoto is a fighter for the respect and goal-minded inspiration. Lyoto has also fought and beaten the likes of great fighters such as B.J. Penn, Rich Franklin, Stephan Bonnar, Soko, KazNak to name a few. But I believe Tito will try not to get knocked out and will go out of his last fight with the UFC as a showman and not a fighter. Too bad. Mach by Uni.

Main Event B.J. Penn vs. Sean Sherk
And the fight we are all waiting to see. Will the freak of nature prove his past steroid use does not effect the true fighter that he is. Or will the now driven B.J. Penn show everyone that he is truly the best pound for pound fighter in the world. I can't wait either way. Sean hasn't fought in over a year but will most likely prove to be a control freak while Penn has fought a couple of toughies to snag the lightweight belt. In my eyes, that time off added to the fuel that has driven B.J. equals a win for Penn. Submission (rear naked?) round three.

So there we have em. Good luck to all fighters and we will see how well everyone does after a matter of hours. I'm pumped.

If you have a need to bet real or fake money, don't forget to check out MMAPlayground.com. And if you are looking for betting advise, check out what FIGHT! Magazine's beautiful and talented Mr. Perfomify has to say in the magazine or head over the best MMA informative website in the world, MMAJunkie.com where he posts his past betting articles and his picks also.

The Brew World....Global Warming=Expensive Beer

Not so fast.

Okay, I will be the first one to admit that I don't carry the recycling bin to the curb every tuesday night or take short showers. Nor am I gonna try and fit my "number two" left-overs onto one or two sheets of toilet paper. Although I do try and limit my excessive use for other reasons. Simply put....economics.

But there may just be an entirely new reason to slap a band aid on old mother earth.

Because she's gonna turn up the heat on Australian barley farmers which in turn effects the crops. So the climate change could spell disaster for brewers all around the world who depend on Australian and New Zealand barley crops. Especially for China according to climate scientist at New Zealand’s National Institute of Water and Atmospheric Research, Jim Salinger.

A similar incident has happened before and is expected to happen again in the future. Here's a little sumsumpin from Realbeer.com talking about Jim's thoughts,

"His is a longterm prediction, looking 30 years out, although brewers around the world experienced the domino effect of a poor crop in Australia last year. China, which now consumes more beer than any country in the world, relies heavily on barley malt from Australia. When that wasn’t available prices around the world went up."

Well this should make it a tad bit easier for the average guy to think about how he treats his planet. I think I might just start recycling. And I suppose I could stop burning random trees for no reason at all.

This is truly scary though.

Flavorites....Meatwater!

I figured that I would start this off with a low blow to vegetarians and those alike. Why? Honestly. How? Is your natural human instinct of consuming meats and fats gone. If so, shame on you!

Seriously folks. We need good amounts of proteins and fats and amino acids and carbohydrates and whatever else to live a healthy and productive life. All provided by meat. Some theoretical scientists even suggest that when our ancient ancestors first thought of meat as an option for survival, it had a huge impact on our brain. Yes. Because those large amounts of nutrients and proteins actually made our brains grow. And from that boost from meat we have evolved into what we are today.

So in some disturbing way, vegetarians and there influences might actually be reversing evolution and throwing away what we've worked so hard for. So are vegetarians slower minded (stupider)? I don't know. But if you were to turn down a kill that dad hunted down for the family way back in the ancient times. You would probably be made into stew. Mmmmmm vegetable stew.

And so brings us to our latest edition of flavorites.

Meatwater. An intricately blended concoction of savory dishes intermingled with something our bodies cannot do with out....water.

These "high efficiency survival beverages," as they put it, are a flavored liquid meal that are packed with nutrients that help the body live the way it is supposed to. Here is an exert from DinnerInABottle.com,

"We at Meatwater use only the finest protein, an organic compound composed of carbon, hydrogen, oxygen and nitrogen. One of the main functions of protein is to synthesize structural proteins like muscle. Protein is also responsible for synthesizing structural hormones like insulin, growth hormone and Insulin Growth Factor I. These are anabolic hormones that can influence many functions in the body, including muscle growth, recovery, strength and absorption of nutrients into your muscle cells. Your body uses protein to make structural and biochemical reactions that are required for muscle contraction, cardiovascular function, and immunity from disease, just to name a few."

Meatwater comes in a whole array of stomach-growling flavors such as Beef Jerky, Cheese Burger, Dirty Hot Dog, Fish'n Chips, Peking Duck, Texas BBQ, and even Hungarian Gulash to name a few. They also have breakfast drinks such as an English Breakfast or Brunch Omelette.

Now I haven't tried one yet so I have many questions. Obviously all of them having to do with taste. But shoot. I'll try anything once. Except vegetarianism.

Check out there website. It's something else. There's a match game and descriptions of all the flavors as well as a contest for a new flavor. I picked Buffalo Wings so don't submit that one. I think that a nice saucy hot wing would be great with water! Haha.

Sweet Ride....Lamborghini SUV

So the perfect scenario would be that you are a sports car lover but have to drop the kids off at school. Well most sports cars aren't very family friendly. Especially a Lambo.

How about a Lamborghini SUV? That would be perfect. Haha. How many mofos do you know that can take the sports car grocery shopping. Sorry. I know that most of us can only dream of having anything close to a beautifully sculpted mess of metals, rubber, oils, and paint that is a Lamborghini.

So bring on the REM!

Here she is. After years of speculation and controversial spy pictures. A successor of the not so popular "Rambo Lambo" (LM002) built in the 1980's. And once thought to be a new prototype of the Porsche Cayenne SUV. Too large and too many frame alterations for it to deceive the crafty lookers. Here is a bit of info from TopSpeed.com,

"The question is what are going to be the performance of a SUV made by a supercar market? Under the bonnet where will be the same 5.0 liter V10 engine used in the Gallardo, but the weight of the SUV will make the car slower. Maximum output will be around 500 hp and the Lambo SUV will hit an estimated top speed of 175-180 mph."

"The 2009 Lamborghini SUV will also get the 4.5 liter V8 engine used in the Cayenne. Also the European market will get the 5.9 litre V12 diesel engine used in the Audi Q7."

So there we have it. The year 2009 might just bring in a new slick version of a whacked out hybrid. I can't wait to get one. But am I the only one who thinks it is a bit ridiculous. A Lamborghini is a Lam bor ghini. A sleek, stylish, futuristic, booty-gettin', expensive speed-demon. And an SUV. An SUV is either for a gangster of sorts who enjoys paying to much for gas while cruisin' with homies or spending time on the river. Or for the middle-aged house wife with four kids and a dog who runs errands all day. Eh, oh well. We shall see how well she sells and to what demographic.

Man vs. Nature....We Walk Wrong?

Evolution is the craziest thing. It adapts with our lifestyles and life changes. But are there certain ways in which we ruin perfectly good evolution. That's the idea of New York Magazine's very own Adam Sternbergh.

He says that our feet are perfect by themselves and our need for shoes is ruining the nature of our walk. Or how he puts it as a past article title, "You Walk Wrong." He then goes on to say that he himself wears shoes that conform to the shape of his foot and are similar to walking barefoot. In fact they are called Vivo Barefoot and are made by the Clark shoe family of England.

Sternbergh supports his theory by comparing the unlikely situation that one would wear an arm cast from age three until much older. And then explains that your arm would simply "not work" after removing the cast. He also gives proof of a 1940's study on the feet of Indian rickshaw drivers, whatever those are, and how healthy their feet are.

My feet aren't healthy?

I don't know about all of this. Is this something like the boxers vs. tighty whitey theory? I can't say that that my feet don't or do work the way they are supposed to. How would I know. I feel fine. Besides, cave men didn't walk so upright did they.

Maybe we have evolved into the shoe and therefore are better with it. I feel as though Mr. Sternbergh is leaving out the fact that 99.99% of us sleep and walk around the house without shoes on. Therefore, our feet adapt to both environments. No?

Although as men, we all have a bit of cave man in us. This is one area I might just keep under wraps. You decide for yourself. Article is linked. There are some cool foot paintings within the article though.

Not So Manly....A-Rod?

So everyone knows that life has it's hard times. Ask Kalib Starnes. But as men, we take those times and turn them into either something to joke about or an unrecoverable memory. So when a guy doesn't grit his teeth and take the bull by the horns, he may look sort of how do you say.... girlie.

Well that is just what one of America's very own MVP's of the major leagues did. So here's the story.

A-freakin' Rod. Yep. Alex Rodriguez. Just doesn't have it in him to follow through with the end result of that eternity that is nine months of pregnancy. The end result of a cloudy evening filled with cocktails and lubricants. Obviously we are are talking about the long awaited delivery of the bag of bones that was once a microscopic olympic swimmer.

Well, I know all too well the discomfort of a hospital. The walls are painted a numbing off-yellow and they pump way too much oxygen into those almost windowless rooms. But. We MUST finish the job A-Rod.

So what happened?

Ol' Rodney ova hea figured he would try and weasel out of the birth of his first born. Haha. Good try...never works. His wife tells about the funny business in this Sports Illustrated article,

"As tough and big as he seems, he is real wimpy around doctors or any type of medical situation," Cynthia Rodriguez said, according to excerpts released Tuesday by YES. "I don't know why I thought the birth of our child would be different. In the middle of the night, I realized that I needed to go to the hospital. I wake him up. The first thing that comes out of his mouth, `Can we call your mother?"

Okay. That's not the main reason A-Rod deserves this month's "Not so manly" badge of dishonor. The damn yankee passed out during labor. Here's more from the article,

"The one nurse had a cold cloth on his head. The other nurse had the blood pressure on his arm. And my mother was like rubbing his back. And he is passed out on a couch. And I am there, in the middle of labor,"

Now I'm not gonna lie. I had a good minute of "holy crap" followed by three or four seconds of nausea during both of my boys' deliveries. But i'll be damned if I was gonna go down without a fight.

Man Tech....TrackPack®

Alright. I sincerely appreciate technology that makes a man's life that much easier. Some of the most important innovations and technologies of our time involve making preparedness a stipulation.

Like with a swiss army knife, you will be prepared for any little job that might pop up. Or with pumps on the tongue of our shoes, we will be prepared to get the local mischievous cat out of our tree. Well today's man tech is all about being prepared.

How about not having to get up and walk to the fridge or cooler for a brewski. Or how about never having to ask a buddy to help you carry the cooler to another location. Or hows never having to buy ice and fill the damn cooler fifty million times a summer sound. Yeah. It sounds frickin awesome.

It's called the TrackPack® cooler and it is just that easy. This waterproof backpack is equipped with three re-usable freezer gel packs. It has easy open dispensers on both sides of the pack and holds a whopping 20 cans. Or you can put whatever you feel in it as if it were a regular cooler such as bottles or foods.

This baby is sweet. I can see myself walking around mingling with friends and watching them lug around a big ol' cooler. I mean how many times have you been pissin' up a tree and ran out of beer mid-stream. Well, with this bad boy, you'd be prepared. How great would it be to be your own bartender or even tend to others if you care that much.

The only flaw I see is it comes without an anti-theft alarm of some sort. Is there any way of knowing that the bastard behind you is taking two at a time. I guess one might notice the cans resettle to the bottom. But not after half a TrackPack. Haha.

Check out there nifty little website at TrackPackCoolers.com

Oh yeah, be sure to have the girlfriend or wifey carry it for you. Like in the picture. And your all set!

Man Of The Month....Albert Hofmann

Men come in all shapes and sizes. But to be recognized and appreciated for something that is considered, by most, to be taboo or even down right satanic is tough on a guy. So for a scientist that was just trying new ways to improve medicine and then accidently touched his work, many lives would be changed.

Back in 1938 a Swiss chemist by the name of Albert Hofmann was messin' with fungus from wheat and such. He then got a little on his finger resulting in a clash with reality as he thought it was. He discovered lysergic acid diethylamide-25. LSD. And the world changed drastically soon after.

Sadly on Tuesday, April 29, 2008 Albert Hofmann died of a heart attack. But at 102 years old. Holy crap. And so I thought it would be worth finding the true worth and greatness of this man by honoring him as the Man of the Month for April.

So what makes him honorable? What makes him such a worthy Man?

Possibly the fact that he changed so many lives. Yes, some for the worse. But think of the positives. How many soldiers were relieved of suffering (may be false) or how many terrorists gave up vital information under the influence (may be false). What about alcoholism treatment before it was illegal, said here by wikipedia,

"Studies in the 1950s that used LSD to treat alcoholism professed a 50% success rate,[39] five times higher than estimates near 10% for Alcoholics Anonymous."

These things are small reasons for appreciation and may not out weigh the ugly effects of LSD. But imagine life with out the creative minds of writers and artists around the world. Without Aldous Huxley we would have no Brave New World. Without Ken Kesey, we would be without Of Mice and Men. Or Hunter S. Thompson's detailed stories. A special thanks to a Mr. Steve Jobs for doing all that acid and help with the development of some of the most creative technologies all men should appreciate.

Okay, okay. I know. Acid is bad. But the man behind the curtain wasn't. He was quoted as saying, "I produced the substance as a medicine ... It's not my fault if people abused it." And it is true. He was only trying to help the intricate world of health and medicine. And along the way he discovered one of the most controversial substances in history.

For a man that was an active with the drug until his freakin nineties. I would say rest in peace. But I am thinking that he did enough of that through out his life after turning spiritual like most users seem to eventually do.

All I can say is. It takes a hell of a man to take that drug the first time. Let alone the first person ever to try it twice.